


Eros/Thanatos

by GirlWolfTattoo



Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Death Threats, Monologue, Other, Past Underage, Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-13
Updated: 2019-01-13
Packaged: 2019-10-09 12:09:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17406647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GirlWolfTattoo/pseuds/GirlWolfTattoo
Summary: Some Valdemar thoughts about the apprentice, and a good reason to send doctor Devorak to hell.(This is an alternate story in which the apprentice had lived at the palace long before the red plague)





	Eros/Thanatos

_Much before you, I loved her first…_

I bet you’re wondering why are you here, don’t you? You’re a good doctor, after all, or at least you try, although your natural born stupidity won’t allow you to reach the level to please me. You’ve been loyal, too, hard-working and an average helper and still you’re here, bound helpless on my table, and I’m about to make you feel the same way I do since you casted your eyes upon the forbidden… Since you tried to steal from me…

What was that? Hold on, let me put that gag away… Oh, you said you haven’t steal anything from me, is that? Allow me to correct you, my dear 069, but you did it… Let me explain you but first… Ah, that’s better, I hate when idiotic interrupt me, I hope the gag is not too tight, we don’t want you to die, not yet…

It was a long time ago when I met her. She was still a young child, soft, innocent, a lovely blossom fighting against a long lasting winter. I met her mother too, and oh she was as beautiful as her, the same dark hair, the same shining eyes, the same… breath of life coming from them, reviving everything they touched. They were Eros, loving and living, in the kingdom of Thanatos, do you know? My kingdom was the winter until they came into it.

I don’t like humans, you know, those disgusting little creatures craving for pleasures they can’t reach and punishing themselves for not to get what they want from each other, but they were different, their lives were for the others, she lived for her mother, her mother lived for everyone, even the poor human remains our patients were, even for me. Her mother gave me her best years, she shared her time with me, she was a tireless worker, the only thing in the world she loved more than her work was her daughter.

And then the winter came back, and that woman died. A cruel disease took her away from me, but she was like the dead tree which trunk allows new life grow up, and that life was her daughter, Renata. What a cabalistic name, don’t you think? It means “she who has reborn”, and when I saw her, standing in front of her mother’s grave I knew it, she was return to me, in the shape of her only child. Finally, she would be mine, and mine alone, her eternal spring would be just for me, and her love… It was the first time I desired something for me, and I wouldn’t let anyone take it from me. Not never.

And so it was, the sweet Renata became my daughter, and I procured her life was as deliciously as her mother would like to be. She came with me to the palace and I presented her to the count, she was very young so I kept her away from any perish until I was sure she could face them. I was wrong, I should have known her heavenly grace wouldn’t pass unnoticed, and I felt the eyes upon her much before she would.

And one day the count talked to me, do you know what he told me? “Your child is not made to be hidden, make her come to my chambers, my dear quaestor, I bet I can find a decent job to her”. But I knew what the count was planning, I’m not an idiot as the rest of you, my Renata was almost fourteen for that time, and the count wanted… wanted _her_. He had his countess, why would he had to take what was rightfully mine? So I made a small deal: Renata would be a maiden from the palace, but he wouldn’t touch her, not even a single braid of her hair would pass between his fingers. Just as the dead ones, we can see them and their effigies but never touch them, and she was dead for everyone but me.

Can you understand why am so pissed with you, 069? You’re not so clueless now, I think, but we can get it much better, don’t you think? And… there we are, a nice peg, now let’s put it on your nose… And that’s it, can you feel it now? It hurts, doesn’t it? , that monstrous feeling of being dying, craving for the smallest puff of air as someone else is avoiding it from you. She was the air to me, the most fresh, pure air I’ve never breathed before, and you, my friend, you were this small, annoying peg.

But how could you? , I bet you’re asking, and I ask the same too, how can a person, a creature like _you_ take the attention and the sweetness from a creature like _her_? You cannot provide her anything, not a comfy place, not nice clothing, not even your time for that one is for your useless patients. How could you...? I see you’re getting a bit purple, 069, let’s put this peg away. Much better, right? As I was saying, I still don’t understand what did she saw in you. Perhaps is because of her mother’s spirit, she wasn’t very clever at choosing, so I had to… choose for her.

Oh, that’s right, we haven’t talk about Renata’s father. He was a flea dog, the worst person I’ve met, a bloody, disgusting little man. He was a doctor, too, I think he was the number… fifteen, sort of, I can’t remember well, I’ve been trying to forget every single detail from him for about eighteen years, but the fact is he tried to steal Renata’s mother, and almost got it. Yes, ‘cause after all, they had a daughter, and they tried to hide her from me… What a mistake! She ran away, still pregnant, he couldn’t. I made him stay, put his hands so full of work he started to get sick, so weak… and it was a matter of time he was really sick, and you know what happened next? I gave him something to release his poor body and soul from suffering. You know, some people cannot detect the arsenic, especially if it is hidden on a beverage…

Don’t make that face, 069, I thought you were more brave! Oh, you’re finding out, that’s right? But hey, you just have to tell me something, one little thing, and I make the promise of let you live, that’s right, I won’t kill you, but you must be honest to me. So, tell me… all this time, when you and my little flower were together, did you put something in her? Did you dared to go beyond her uncovered shoulders from that masquerade dress? Did you kissed something besides her gracious face? Did your hands traveled through her inner clothing? Did you dared to… steal her from me?

I see… You didn’t. I’m going to believe you this time, 069, and I will keep my promise, but not for me… The Death, my dear friend, the Death was more powerful than us, more powerful than a dying father and a disastrous doctor like you… yes, I’ve confirmed it today, that sick count has told me, as we are here, speaking, she’s in the Lazaret. And it was because of you, and that’s why you’re here today.

What are those, doctor, tears? I’m not going to kill you, I said… or is there another reason for your cry?... Don’t you say, it’s because of her? It is? Well, you should have think of it before crawling her into your hell… If you just hadn’t cast your damned eyes upon her, if you just… Oh, how I hate you, 069, I hate you with all my being, and I’d love to destroy every part of you with my own hands… but I won’t. She would be so sad, and I don’t want her to be sad anymore.

There you are, be free. I won’t kill you, but the plague sure will do. You’re going to stay here, day and night, until your own bloody curse take you away and your putrid corpse disappear, I’ll be sure you won’t go to Lazaret, you’ll never be close to her again, are you listening? My crimson little friends will take care of you when the glorious day of your decease comes, and the rest of you –your books, your writings, I’ll cast them on fire, nobody’s going to remember your existence, dear doctor, and you can bet… I’ll make sure you’ll never find her again…

_…Well hello, did we met before?_


End file.
